Things I Am Not Proud of Doing —bit finger while shoving sandwich in mouth —punched self in face while pulling on a sock —drooled just now
— Bart King (@BartKing) January 26, 2015
Did I ever tell you about when I did a charity walk for equal rights and tore my ACLU?
— Bart King (@BartKing) January 24, 2015
I just spread peanut butter on a peanut-butter cookie, and ripped a hole in the space-time continuum.
— Bart King (@BartKing) January 17, 2015