January 1, 2019

In a poll of what numbers are "easiest to remember"...

... the winners were 8, 1, 100, 2, 17, 5, 9, 10, 99, and 11.

Respondents also thought of them as "good" — which is weird, because 17 is a totally garbage number.

One of my favorite middle-grade book report opening lines:

"This was pretty good, for a book."

THEY MADE THE ULTIMATE SACRIFICE


YOU’LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE

#thuglifeforever

Bookstore Moments

CUSTOMER: I’m looking for a children’s book called Claudia Shanked the Meatball.

ME: ...

CUSTOMER: ...

ME: Could it be Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs?

CUSTOMER: That’s it!

IMPORTANT NOTICE:







This will never not make me laugh.

Found this note inside a copy of Beverly Cleary’s BEEZUS AND RAMONA ...

... and now I can’t rest until I know if Miles got his money!

Sorry, it's not a very old Lang sign.

(You know, Auld Lang Syne?)

At the gym:

ME: Look at all these New-Year’s-resolution people working out, lol 

EVERYONE ELSE: Why is that bald guy sitting on the rowing machine backwards?