Would you like to know more? Naturlich!
"Everything that can be known about beards and much
that can't." --The London Weekly Gazette
"Underwood's revolutionary syntheses lift the science
of pogonology to hitherto undreamed of heights!" --Beards Illustrated
See how Whitman's beard stacks up against Longfellow's, Homer's, and Tennyson's! Poets Ranked by Beard Weight is a classic of Edwardian esoterica, a privately printed leaflet offered by subscription to the informed man of fashion and as a divertissement au courant for reading bins and cocktail tables of parlor cars, and libraries and smoking lounges of gentlemen's clubs . . .
Of particular interest is Underwood's most significant invention-a grading system, known as the "Underwood Pogonometric Index," which calculates what he called "poetic gravity," or beard weight. Also included are the fundamentals of beard flirtation and a complete history of beard-based folklore and controversies.
2 comments:
I have a very old publication by Tennyson,"The Complete Poetical Works", 'Author's Household Edition', Boston: Houghton, Osgood and Company. (Some serious caligraphy at his point): The Riverside Press, Cambridge. 1879. I must fully appreciate my beard's weight... for it is more representative of my early morning laziness than of stought, manly countenance. (Early morn' bein' pre- 3 in the am).
My beard is, a representation, an ommage to my early morning existance, for I have not the time nor the patience to cope with my own presence at such an ungodly hour prior to dawn, and must procede dilligently forward towards a goal only recognized by the local grocer/cafe. Everyone wants their bread...
I have Tennyson's 'Complete Poetical Works', 'Author's household edition. Boston: Houghton, Osgood and Company. (Some serious caligraphy here;) The Riverside Press, Cambridge. 1879.
I'm proud of my own beard weight, regardless of its implications toward literary/artistical/profetical tendencies. It is a pure homage of my own indefferance towards a typical masculine countenance. I am too lazy a 2 o'clock in the a.m. to be concerned with anything other than showing a sudo-sub-culture-capability/significance towards the ultimate outcome of this rat-race.
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