This is a ski mask.

It's called a beardski. (I want!)

Join the Boy Scouts and grow a beard.

Yep, it's an actual ad campaign for the Boy Scouts done by Ogilvy Atlanta.

"Poets Ranked by Beard Weight"

The arrival of this indispensable book is a cause for rejoicing among those who closely follow the competitive world of bearded poets.

Would you like to know more? Naturlich!

"Everything that can be known about beards and much that can't." --The London Weekly Gazette

"Underwood's revolutionary syntheses lift the science of pogonology to hitherto undreamed of heights!" --Beards Illustrated

See how Whitman's beard stacks up against Longfellow's, Homer's, and Tennyson's! Poets Ranked by Beard Weight is a classic of Edwardian esoterica, a privately printed leaflet offered by subscription to the informed man of fashion and as a divertissement au courant for reading bins and cocktail tables of parlor cars, and libraries and smoking lounges of gentlemen's clubs . . . 

Of particular interest is Underwood's most significant invention-a grading system, known as the "Underwood Pogonometric Index," which calculates what he called "poetic gravity," or beard weight. Also included are the fundamentals of beard flirtation and a complete history of beard-based folklore and controversies.

Wait—what exactly is this book about?

From here.

Bad Ideas: The Neck Beard

You've probably seen a chinstrap beard recently. It’s just a narrow beard that follows a line along the jaw and chin, but has no mustache. And if you've see one, the beard was probably pretty short. Why?

Because there is only ONE thing worse than a long chinstrap beard. And that’s a long neck beard. (After seeing this one, I’ve been trying to un-see it ever since!)

Neck beard courtesy of the Neutral Milk Hotel.